Day Off

I'm coming out of the equivalent of an all-night study session that lasted more than six weeks. I just overcame two major obstacles to my freedom from grad school, well, from school in general (I've only been a college student for 10 years). I have a lot of work to do before I finish at the end of next month but I took a much needed break today and went biking with a friend of mine, and Erin's dog, Kaya.

Not a dog door

I lost 20 pounds during the spring and summer and in my basement banishment have just about ten back on. I was riding so strong early in the summer that I actually enjoyed going up the hills as much as going down. Well. . . not quite. So this ride that I somehow convienced myself was a quick up and down ending up being 13-14 miles up a mountain and 3 miles down. I'm not in shape. I ended up having one of those legendary migranes (that's what I call them anyway) that I can't remember having for quite a while during the ride and thought I was going to throw up during the last 45 minutes of it. The ride that I imagined taking a couple of hours ended up being 31/2. Instead of writing a cover letter and preparing a resume with the rest of my day I slept, the only consolation was that Kaya was as pooped as I was.

This was another day, we had just got back from jogging in 90+ temps (dumb, I know)

I felt better in time to go to one of Erin's freshman sexual violence presentations. I know she doesn't like to hear it but I'm so impressed with her ability to tackle challanging tasks and go home and live a (relatively) normal life. There were 400 freshman in this room for a mandatory presentation and Erin had organized a program that approached a number of touchy subjects in a way that got all of their attention, and set a mood that made them respectful!

Anyway, sorry if I'm going on. I feel like someone hit the pressure relief valve and I gassing off. You all know how much I enjoy that (I'm thinking of a cabin in the sawtooth mountains).

Another Priceless Contribution

Sarah was another taker on the offer of self-liberation from some of our more embarassing photos. The first photo I looked at was the one on the left. It made me think of comments about how some of the pictures that I posted didn't look that bad. It seems that I'm an example of my own argument.

Then I opened this gem , I'm always a little self-conscious when I bust up laughing all by myself (I don't know why), but this one made me glad I wasn't drinking coke when I saw it. Congratulations Sarah, you are now free.
I just finished a presentation and am a little worn out from the whole thesis thing so I'll make this it for now. More to come.

I just read Paul's blog (I know I said I was leaving) but that pretty much sums up the feeling of life so far. I've talked to Erin about this, the feeling of being destined for being great and looking back and seeing how different your path is from how you expected it to be is pretty humbling. I don't have a point other commenting on how insightful Paul's comments were. Maybe I'll have some huge moment of reflection when I turn 30. I already can tell you its not as old as I thought it would be when I was 10. I'm for being close to family and friends, Mom and Glen (and family) are so close that it kills me my school has been so involved that I can't even take a weekend to get away and see them. OK, now I'm done.

Beauty and the Beast

So Erin bravely shared a photo with me without any prodding. I couldn't really get much detail out of her but the photo was named "Turkeyetc." so I'm guessing that Erin's motivation here is that feeling we all know to well (bloated, when is nap time?). The scarf around the head is anyone's guess. Maybe its to help keep the food down. I just realized that I made a whole story out of a picture that I have no idea about. Feel free to set the record straight, Erin.


Here are a couple of additions to the Joel photo blog of shame. How can a photo possibly go wrong when you haven't had a proper shower for a few weeks. As you can tell, I really like cornbread. It really satisfies my hunger.














Mmmmmm, that was some good cornbread! If you are all wondering what an attractive (despite the red devil eyes) person like Erin is doing with a slob like me, join the club, members: many.


In the news world of Joel, I want to first congratulate the Broncos and tell the booing bronco fans to eat poo. That was a pretty good game and made some of the heart burn I experience when I think of the first two games dissipate.

Second of all, Happy birthday to Paul. I agree with Glen (or was it Steve?). I haven't felt any "big brother, little brother stuff" for a while now and really appreciate that my family members are also important to me as friends.

I fininished and sent in a thesis draft to my advisor this weekend. I still have a lot of work to do in the next few weeks but it was a big step and makes me feel less under the oppressive stress, at least for a few days.

I've been impressed with everyone's efforts at stepping up to the challange of accepting our worst. My invitation stands to anyone that wants to send me photos for posting. That's it for now.

Being OK with myself

I want to go along with something Paul wrote a few days ago. It was the difference between the way we think we look and the way we actually look. Going back to see what kind of comment's people left on my own blog, I was repeatedly horrified to see my own image on the screen (I know, it wasn't the most flattering picture, read on), and to be honest I was already concocting the next blog that would push that picture down the page and out of my sight. But that got me thinking, why don't I just embrace my worst? That way when I see myself in a picture that actually looks like . . . well . . .me, I can be satisfied with the fact that no, I don't look like a sex-symbol like the picture in my mind (of my macho self, not Brad Pitt). So here goes my liberation from my ugliness.



Yeah, that was bad but could have been worse, BELIEVE ME. I wanted Erin to take a picture of me in the least flattering pose I could make (its a wonder I haven't been dumped yet) but I forgot. I figured double chin and chubby belly and love handles squeezed into tight biking cloths is hard to beat. The only drawback that I can see is that the helmet sort of hides my receding hairline, I'll do better in the future. I challenge anyone who is up to it to post the least flattering picture of themselves that they can find or create. No offense but I've seen some of a few of you (ahem! Joni and Paul faces, speedoey Glen, reflections of passing airplanes on Steve's head, the list goes on). Join me in liberating ourselves from a distorted perspective on our self-image of sexiness! I'm hoping in the end it will turn me into a self-actualized, sexy man, without the need for any illusions.

So, I've been pretty focused on my Thesis . . .

First off, I want to apologize the half of you I offended without even writing a single word. Second, I want to apologize to the rest of you that I will probably offend at some time in the future. I can't believe I'm doing this. I totally caved into pressure and sold my soul. I must say that I've become addicted to the whole thing and (before now) didn't even have my own blog. I'll keep this short today (and probably a lot of other days, too) because I really do have a lot to do tonight other than write my thoughts and feelings. My roomate is re-doing her bathroom and when I saw the toilet sitting on the back porch I just couldn't resist. Yes, I've put back on 10lbs. Sitting in front of a computer for 14+ hours a day is not a good weight-loss program.

Before signing off I'll put out some warnings and disclaimers:

1. I often annoy myself with how random my thinking is and how little control I often have of keeping random thoughts to myself. My posts will probably be filled with parenthesis, run on sentences, and incoherant comments. At the moment I'm not too excited about editing my writing, so you've been warned
2. I realize that some of my opinions are not shared by all but may just accidentally let some of them slip anyway. I hope I don't come off argumentative, but refer to my first point for my editing policy.
3. I don't have a #3 at the moment but making a numbered list with only two points didn't seem right.

People have been talking about the weather getting cold. This second picture is from my front yard, I live in a beautiful place and hope to get out in the great outdoors soon.

Die thesis, Die! (That was actually pretty long, huh? I'm a big fat liar)