Some Thoughts

OK, I want to put a disclaimer out there before you start reading this. I'm in a thoughtful mood so I'm sorry if some of this stuff makes you want to gag.

Erin and I have been talking lately about how it seems that for some time, because of the strain that preparing my thesis has been, I/we seem to put satisfaction and peace as something we will achieve down the road. "I can't wait to get this damn thing done so I can start enjoying my life again." I've been thinking about a lot of hypothetical requirements for my satisfaction. A lot of it is money related.

Tonight instead of running out to rent a video or going someplace to eat (all good things); I cooked a good meal, sat in the bathtub and read (before you laugh, my legs have been really sore), and then brought some work into my living room, put on some jazz and leisurely got about my business (thesis). I was stuck as I sat there by how simple what I had done was, and how completely relaxed I felt doing it.

I started thinking about our convenience/entertainment devices that are so hard to live without and realized that, at least for me, they control me to a large degree. I impulsively check my email while I'm working, I instinctively scan amazon.com for "deals" of things that I somehow am convinced that I need. The way I looked at it tonight made me feel like I have voluntarily plugged myself into a commercial for a hundred things that seem like I must have them. I have a lot of these things now, and I know they don't really bring me that much satisfaction. For example, I was looking at an Xbox 360. I have a playstation that I maybe play once a month, and when I do play it I often feel like I just wasted some time that could have been spent doing something else. It's crazy. I bought a $200 phone because I was so impressed with all of its features, but it does the same thing for me that a $50 phone would have done. I could go on. Advertisers are smart, and they have a hook for every person's Achilles’ heel out there.

I guess I'm saying that these things are fine and good, but I want to be aware of the difference between these things serving me and me serving them (or the pocketbook of the people that sell them to me). Sorry if my little diatribe about consumerism has been annoying. My control and awareness of this stuff swings back and forth like a pendulum. I just felt like putting my thoughts down. I'm going to go watch the Nuggets/Jazz game now.
:)

P.S. I really enjoyed ready everyone's comments about the things that comfort them and make them feel like things are right in the world. I sounds like you all have a better handle on this than I do.

Back by Popular Demand

Hey everyone. I decided to give a little update since I haven't done this for a little while. I've been busy and then bored in the month and a half since I wrote last, but just didn't have much interest in blogging (for whatever reason). I've enjoyed reading about what you guys are doing, so I figured at least an update every now and then is pretty painless. Sorry if this is newsletterish.

Last weekend Erin flew in to Salt Lake and met up with me and a couple of her friends from college to visit and ski. It was the first time that I met them, and as with most of Erin's friends I felt like we had been friends for a long time after I just met them. I think that is more about them though. I laughed as we were leaving Glen and Kendi's (see Kendi's "Porker" photo) because it seemed like Glen and Kendi hit it off as quickly as I did. We met up with Glen later that night at the Market Street Grill but I think Kendi couldn't find anyone to take care of the kids (?). It was a short but great visit with them. I really do enjoy being around them and the kids, it makes me wish we were all closer because I love being around everyone in the family. Such is life, huh?

We skied at Alta, which was nice though bittersweet when it was dumped on the day after we skied there. The last time Erin skied she had a serious break in her leg. She was really nervous to get back on the slopes after (more than 5?) years but was really great. She has some obvious ability but it was easy to tell when uncertainty creeped in, it seriously changed her ability level. I think we all have things that we can do better than our minds allow us sometimes. Erin's friends took pictures that I'll try to post when/if I get them. The weather was perfect. All in all it was a great/busy weekend, I had a blast but would have liked to relax a bit more and see a little more of the Salt Lake Moore family.

I'm trying to find out from my boss here at USU when exactly the funding for my salary will run out, I think it will be soon, maybe a month (?). So I'm looking for jobs and will start spreading my resumes around. I'm focusing on a few places in the Rocky Mountain region, though Erin's school and work may mean that Bozeman is the most likely place that I'll land in the near future. I'm good with that, I really love a lot of things about Bozeman and am getting over the few negative connections in my mind.

I'll write more soon, I'm happy and healthy and looking forward to the longer day lengths that let me get outside a little more. Maybe I'll put finding a non-basement living situation on my list of things to do. Oh yeah, that reminds me. Things are progressing with my thesis. It hasn't been a big stressor for me and I'm hoping that I can chip away at what remains to be done without making it a big stressor. Lata!